Preheat the oven to 375°F (190°C) and line a cupcake pan with paper liners.
Beat the softened butter and granulated sugar until light and fluffy.
Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition and scraping the bowl as needed.
In a separate bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, nutmeg, and salt.
Add part of the dry mixture to the butter mixture and mix gently. Add the spiced rum, then the remaining dry ingredients, eggnog, and sour cream. Mix just until the batter is smooth and evenly combined.
Divide the batter between the cupcake liners, filling each about two-thirds full.
Bake for 14 to 16 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean or with a few moist crumbs.
Transfer the cupcakes to a wire rack and allow them to cool completely.
For the buttercream, beat the softened butter until light and fluffy.
Gradually add the powdered sugar, mixing on low speed at first. Slowly add the eggnog and nutmeg, then beat until smooth and fluffy.
Pipe or spread the buttercream over the completely cooled cupcakes.
Finish with a light sprinkle of nutmeg, if desired.